Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Miracles really can happen!

It's only taken two years - literally two years, almost to the day - but my landlord is finally going to fill the mouse holes in the kitchen. Amen, amen, and hallelujah! Finally, I will be able to have people in my home again. It's been two years of not wanting to even make a simple meal for the closest of my friends because part of the kitchen baseboards have been covered over with bricks and steel wool, hiding the gnawed out gateway to the rodent kingdom below the building.

If any of you were crazy enough to be reading this blog back in April 2005 (I think my readership was limited to the Sasquatch and people hitting "next blog" at that point) you'd know I had an ongoing battle with mice in the kitchen. I also developed a bad case of "Blogger's Tourettes" - swearing like a sailor out here about the critters I had to glue trap repeatedly (cruel, yes, but very effective.) What a pleasure it will be to not be grossed out or freaked out walking through the kitchen!

Now, if I win the lottery and the eyeball heals itself, I may actually have proof of the existence of God. That would be The Divine Trifecta, as far as I'm concerned. In the name of the mice, the money, and the vision, amen.

Actually, I think I may get sent to a very, very Catholic Hell for that version of the Trinity.

Eh, if there is a God, and he doesn't have a good sense of humor, what's the point of heaven anyway?

I think I'll take my crackerbox-apartment-sans-mousies heaven on earth right now, thanks!



Heather Meadows said...


I was having a conversation with a Christian friend the other day about God having a sense of humor, actually. I told him essentially the same thing as you said: it would be pretty boring if God didn't want you to laugh, and Satan got all the jokes.

(I'm agnostic, myself, but these sorts of conversations are fun.)

Chuck said...

Good news! For some reason, mice always freak me out. I remember one time back when I was in the military, I was watching a horror movie and a mice in this rather run-down dormitory I lived in chose that moment to run across the room...I screamed rather loudly. Fortunately my roommate wasn't there.

Anonymous said...

Ah, I do believe God has a sense of humour, and knows your heart:) Glad you'll have a real kitchen, sans rodents, again! -- Robin

Scholiast said...

Good riddance :) Now, the other two will come along shortly. Things always happen in threes...

Spocko said...

Glad to here it. I was having a conversation with Joe Conason the other day (name dropper, me!) and he was saying, "Have you talked to the people in Washington?" Like we all have contacts in Washington, and I said no because I knew he was talking about Media Matters.
I thought of you. "Well I DO have a contact in Washington! You!"

Sorry to hear about the check card crap. I remember during one Christmas season someone bought bunch of toys from a Disney Store in SF. This was after I had just left the store buying something small. Now Since I didn't notice the charge right away they got away with it. I can't prove the clerk had something to do with it, but I had that Harried look of someone who doesn't look at their bills carefully. And they were right.

Yep. Mice are real pains in the ass.

Anonymous said...

A long time ago we had a mouse problem - I tried stalking the dam thing, it went behind the microwave - attempt to crush - too thin! Tried to grab, it jumped over my hand. Had to resort to lethal method i.e. poison. Sad but true. I now have a thing about mice, if the kids leave food about I freak a bit.

Leaving that, if there is an omnipresent and omnipotent god, he must have a sense of humour to ensure I get paid the crap salary I draw, and a warm side to ensure I do get some overtime.


suze said...

hooray for mousefree living.

and i'm rather fond of your devine trifecta. god must understand ;)