I've retreated to the coffee shop, where I do some of my best writing, for the first time in ages. Within two minutes of arriving, I've:
1. Mistaken a conversation in Polish for Russian and made myself look like a linguistic moron when I asked the two dudes a question po russki;
2. Smacked some guy writing an academic paper about the human genome project in the head with my computer cord;
3. Turned my cafe mocha cup into a dribble glass and poured part of it down the front of my shirt. Yes, I have a drinking problem.
I'm planning on being here for a couple of hours. Let's see how else I can embarrass myself in the next 120 minutes...
I do stuff like that all the time (the dribbling, not the Russian part...I wish I had the linguistic know-how to make that kind of mistake.) Maybe we should design some sort of bib on Cafepress (sex weasel bib?)
On Friday, I was chaperoning a class trip...we were in a portrait gallery and I was taking photos. I took a few steps backwards to get a longer view - proceeded to slam into, and onto the feet of, a young (late teen-early 20s) man. Mumbled something about him being so quiet I didn't know he was there, and ran off. Suppose I should feel lucky I didn't knock him over. But scared the heck out of him, poor dude.
Whenever I wear a shirt that shows off stains (white) I seem to manage to spill coffee or whatever I'm eating on it. Most of my work shirts are dark colored.
Doncha just hate when that happens? I always manage to dribble on myself whenever I write a white shirt. Never fails.
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