What if... Volume II

...or, You Lost Me at Eating While Peeing.

Time travel movie #2, Freedom Deep, has been deep sixed. I made it through 43 minutes of this crap, but only by fast forwarding through large chunks. There's no dialogue and the film is clearly the creation of a frustrated music video director. (Either that, or he really wanted to make "The Wall.") It's Australian, and usually I'm a big fan of Australian indie film. This, however, blows.

Freedom Creep? Freedom Bleak? Oh, forget it.
This movie's too dismal to try to be funny.

It's the story of a neglected kid who finds inspiration in the music of Kurt Cobain, and, after a journey where he runs away from home and is adopted by a fringey gay couple, he eventually becomes a prophet after some apocalyptic war in the early 21st century. (All I know is, the world is one big desert by 2018.) Kurt Cobain's ghost plays a role in the film, but I couldn't be bothered to watch that far in. I was too grossed out by the kid's hideous, drooling father who pees into a bedpan under the dining room table while eating Mum's nasty-looking stew.

I'm off to try Movie #3, which, god help me, features Gavin McLeod and Hal Linden. No, it's not old. It's from 2002. A time travel movie from 2002 with Cap't Steubing and Barney Miller. This will be quite something...