Thursday, April 14, 2005

Apple Pits

I needed to buy that fabulous staple antiperspirant/deodorant yesterday during my Target foray. My usual brand (and god knows why I have such brand loyalty) is for the Lady Speed Stick gel. However, I get the impression that Mennen (sing it, now: byyyy MEN-nen!) is phasing the gel out, as is it harder and harder to find. And, alas, Target, Home of Every Friggin' Thing Available, did not have the much-prized gel.

So, I spent a whole 30 seconds or so perusing the other options. Being unemployed, cheap, and a total ho for a bargain, my eyes stopped on a special deal - $2.99 for two Lady Speed Stick "invisible dry" wrapped up with a free travel size shower gel. I'm sold! Well, here I am this morning, opening the packaging. I had assumed the scent would be something fairly normal - you know, Shower Fresh or Baby Powder.

Nope.

Appears I have Orchard Blossom. It smells like apples. Really really powerfully scented apples.

Now, who decided that women would want their armpits to smell like apples? Jesus, it smells like I glued a handful of Jolly Ranchers to my pits! I'll stick with this today, but the first time someone asks me if I have any watermelon Jolly Ranchers to share, this junk goes in the trash.

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