Saturday, April 16, 2005

Musical Abortion

Ever hear of t.A.T.u.? It's the crap Russian pseudo-lesbians-for-pop-consumption "band" whose greatest hit, to my knowledge, was wearing t-shirts on Leno that read "Go fuck yourself" in Russian. ("Na khui" - which literally is a directional statement "on dick"...) They're really dreadful, and tonight I discovered that, sadly, they were allowed to do a remake of "How Soon Is Now."

Now, kids, there are only two people who should be allowed to sing this: Morrissey, and that guy from the Psychedelic Furs. Actually, Morrissey is the ONLY one who should really be allowed to sing it, but that guy from the Psychedelic Furs sang it with his other band (Love Spit Love?) and it was used as the theme to Charmed, a show that isn't very good, but, if you're unemployed and catch a lot of "Primetime in the Daytime" on TNT, you see too much of and... oh wait, I derailed my train of thought. What was my point? Oh yeah - it becomes terribly familiar when sung by Pretty in Pink man. Whether it should or not. Whether it sucks or not.

Anyway, t.A.T.u. covered "How Soon Is Now" and, while I would beg you not to buy it, I recommend you listen to the free snippet on iTunes and see just how awful it is. Musical freakin' train wreck. But I'm sure Russia adores them. Fine. Let them stay there, please. I'd rather listen to the white boy rap of Boghdan Titomir for hours on end than see these critters on American tv again. (And if you know Boghdan Titomir - and for your sake, I hope you don't - you know the pain I'm willing to endure to avoid t.A.T.u....)

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