This week, a mobile phone ringtone outsold real music on the top of the UK pop charts. Yep. That's right, buckaroos. A friggin' ringtone. Now, keep in mind, I don't find ringtones themselves to be evil. (They are evil, however, when they're heard in movie theaters and other spots where people have an expectation of quiet.) First off, I myself have supported the ringtone industry by letting Sony pick my pockets for the variety of tones programmed into my phone - if I hear Erasure, I know it's the Sasquatch at home, Depeche Mode - the Sasquatch at work, and the theme to Bewitched means it's my sister, Nurse Rachet. (This last one is amusing if you know her real name.) Second, I know someone who is involved in the design of innovative ringtones, and I really like and respect said person. A whole lot. And, if said person reads this entry, I'd be dying to hear his thoughts on this turn of events, especially as he's first and foremost a musician.
And, truly, it would do no good at all to deny that ringtones are a very, very big business, indeed, especially for the youth market. But, c'mon! When ringtones outsell music ON A MUSIC CHART... well, that's just wrong, kids. The saddest part is, it's a really shitty ringtone.
Don't believe me? Can it really suck that much? Yes, it can. Coldplay lost out to this crap. Roll over the stupid image of the mutant frog riding the rocket and give a listen. Be sure to stay for the "bam-bam-be-de-brrrrr" motorcycle sound. It's so exciting. (Ugh.)
Can someone explain this to me? Mass hysteria in the UK?
Somewhere, on the misty isle of Avalon, Arthur spins like an overheated turbine...